Something in the water triggered me
Left me feeling misaligned
I guess I’m fine but with more time
I’ll realize I’m not meant to be
Dragged down by these subtle pleas
Counting beans so anxiously
Why is that those with less are often the first to give?
Why is that scarcity lights a pathway to your own generosity?
And that the more you remain grateful, the more you gain velocity
Removed from the things that you have
Aligned with the ways of the Earth
If I can be someone who gives readily
Than I know I’m one with the dirt
Give me seeds, don’t be shy
I’m ready to give birth
To flowers, trees and dandelions
With faeries in their skirts
Asking for help and asking for support has always been hard for me. White supremacy teaches us that we are a burden. We are taught to give without ever expecting reciprocity. We are taught that if we take up space, or earn resources, that we are necessarily depriving someone else. Our nourishment is always placed in juxtaposition with someone else’s harm. But these beliefs are not in alignment with life itself. They no longer serve us and we have to let them go. We have to choose to heal them.
In life, the water and the sun and the air and the soil all work together to create an environment for each plant to grow. In life there is balance and cycles and even decay creates space for something new to be born. There is always creation. There is always life finding some new avenue to make itself known.
I have a lot to say. We’ve been incubating this art for a really long time and there is so much that is ripe and ready.
I’ve long internalized the notion that I have to do it all on my own even when I know that attempting to do so only harms me and hinders the work. I know that I still entertain beliefs that no longer serve me. Beliefs rooted in proving that I’m allowed to be here and that I’m allowed to do these things I was made to do. I’m choosing to let those beliefs go. I’m choosing to heal them.
That looks like asking for help more starting right now. If you’d like to support me and this work - you can follow me on my Pateron (which is for my public work) https://www.patreon.com/sarahailemariam or you can send support via PayPal https://www.paypal.me/sarahailemariam.
This work is going to remain as accessible as possible so I’ll keep sharing on my Instagram and you can join our mailing list for monthly updates and follow the band’s Instagram for upcoming music shares. We have a lot in the pipeline - actual things you can buy and own and hold and more things you can hear, but in order to get them made (while staying in integrity) we could use some help. Even sharing the work is a load of help. Streaming the new EP. It all helps. No matter what, I’m grateful to you for being here. No matter what the work continues.❤️